Monakhos

I started my first day at a new job today. It was somewhat of a relief to get out of the atmosphere of the last days of my former job. Not because I didn’t like the job or because I didn’t like the people, but because the company had decided to merge my division with a recent acquisition, and as a result, our entire product line was being thrown away. The product line I had spent countless hours working on. So, rather than find another job in the company, I moved to an ad agency in town.

So far it’s a really nice encouraging atmosphere. It’s a small team with big dreams. It seems like the sky is the limit and that is very encouraging. I’ll post some once some of my work goes live.

On a spiritual note, I’ve been re-reading a great book on Feng Shui named “Clearing Your Clutter with Feng Shui” by Karen Kingston. It’s a great book (as is the other one on Feng Shui by the same author. It really makes you think about simple ways to make your area a better place to live. I would recommend reading it even if you don’t consider yourself a clutterholic.

I don’t know why I have been gone so long. Not much to write about. I read this quote last week, though, and thought to post it. It’s from The Fall by Albert Camus. For some reason I found it very interesting.

A natural balcony fifteen hundred feet above a sea still visible bathed in sunlight, on the other hand, was the place where I could breathe most freely, especially if I were alone, well above the human ants. I could readily understand why sermons, decisive preachings, and fire miracles took place on accessible heights. In my opinion no one meditated in cellars or prison cells (unless they were situated in a tower with a broad view); one just became moldy. And I could understand the man who, having entered holy orders, gave up the frock because his cell instead of overlooking a vast landscape as he expected, looked out on a wall. Rest assured that as far as I was concerned I did not grow moldy. At every hour of the day, within myself and among others, I would scale the heights and light conspicuous fires, and a joyful greeting would rise toward me. Thus at least I took pleasure in life and in my own excellence.

The Fall – Albert Camus (Justin O’Brien – tr)

There is a lot more in the book to talk about, but that will come later.

This evening I looked in the mirror and saw a stranger. It puzzled me for a second until I realized it was me. I stared at my image for a few minutes and pondered the idea that I am encapsulated inside of this shell. It was a weird feeling. I’ve been thinking about it sense then. It made me remember the form of meditation that asks the question “what am I?” I really felt for that moment that I understood that I am not my body or any of its attributes. I simply am.

I decided this afternoon that I would start the new year out right. Daily meditation and the study of sacred texts are two things that need to play a more prominent role in my life. I started the habit off with a selection from The Philokalia—a collection of writings by mystical Orthodox priests and monks compiled by St Nikodimos and St Makarios. I plan to continue reading through the entire work, posting about various selections I have read (probably with some breaks in between – the entire work is split into four volumes!)

The first section of The Philokalia is a collection of excerpts from a writing by St Isaiah, who lived in the deserts of Egypt and Palestine around the 5^th century, on guarding the intellect. The mind is a battlefield and unless if one is mindful and keeps it guarded, an individual cannot have communion with God.

Unless a man hates all the activity of this world, he cannot worship God. (v13)

The first virtue is detachment, that is, death in relation to every person or thing. This produces the desire for God, and this in turn gives rise to the anger that is in accordance with nature, and that flares up against all the tricks of the enemy. Then the fear of God will establish itself within us, and through this fear love will be made manifest. (v25)

We have practiced virtue and done what is right, turning our desire towards God and His will, and directing our incensive power, or wrath, against the devil and sin. What then do we still lack? Inward meditation. (v26)

This whole reading reminded me of the Dhammapada and other Buddhist scriptures. The mind is constantly being attacked by evil and the flesh is a distraction from unity with God. Only once we understand that we are not our minds (thoughts) and achieve detachment from our bodies can we really fix anything. Once we do realize this detachment; however, a whole new world is uncovered. We manifest an “anger in accordance with nature” (to put it the way St Isaiah put it) against evil. We are able to truly love. We are one with God (theosis.)

I’ve never been one to make New Year’s resolutions. It just always seemed odd; why wait til a year starts to start or stop a habit or do whatever else you may want. What about the rest of the year?

That said, it’s wierd how this year I’ve been feeling a lot of resolve and have been making a few resolutions of my own this year. To top it off, I didn’t realize until two days ago, that they could be construed as New Year’s resolutions.

I guess the whole point of this is just to serve as a reminder. Whenever you are reading this, there’s no better day than today to start something new. Screw the next year… Do it now.